Sunday, January 17, 2016

Have you ever said "I won't do that? It isn't for me" and then get hit in the forehead by God, who obviously laughed and said "you wanna bet?"

So, our snowglobe has been shook up in a mighty way. Last year, while trying to fund raise for international adoption (and getting nowhere) both David and I had this complete change of heart.  Both of us, who were completely closed to the idea of fostering, came together and discoverd that our hearts had been changed and were ready to sign up for PATH classes and get started on the path for fostering. We had no clue what we had in store. We got the boys on board and started getting all the info together that DCS needed from us. We had some big decisons to make, like what kind of kid we could handle, what age group, could we care for siblings, etc.

As you know, the testosterone in our house was way too much. 2 boys, 1 husband, 1 cat, and 1 dog.... all boys. It was a no-brainer to put down that we would take a girl, aged newborn to 5. One night, much to our astonishment, Micah, who was 7 at the time, prayed for, wait for it.... twins. Blonde twins, blond twin girls. David and I both looked at each other and I think one of us mouthed "WHAT?!?!" Micah was so sure of his prayers, so confident.  He had been praying for snow so that he would get snow days and God had answered every one of those prayers. "God can do it."

And so it goes..... we finished up all the requirements and the home study. Micah had changed his prayer a little and jokingly said he was going to pray for a boy too (after I was frustrated cleaning the bathroom and said not another boy would step foot in this house). David accepted a position with the state of Tennessee. We found out he would go out of town for 6 weeks for training, only coming home on Friday and leaving us again on Sunday afternoon. While he was gone, I would work in the baby's room. I painted and hung things and folded clothes and blankets. I did the curtains and organized the things we had been given. The boys would ask when we were getting our baby girl and one day I said that maybe she hadn't been born yet. I told David that we would get the call right before he came home from academy.....

Sure enough, one week left for David, I was hooked up, getting my weekly dose of iron when the call came. The guy said he had...... wait for it....... twins. I laughed... I mean, how could I not laugh? He asked if something was funny and I said "God has an amazing sense of humor." David couldn't have his phone at academy and could only check messages on breaks. I called and texted leaving messages like "call me", "I have to talk to you now," "why aren't you calling me?!?!" In the end, I ended up telling the case worker I couldn't get in touch with Dave  but we would take the placement. When he asked if I was sure, shouldn't I talk to my husband first, I replied with something like "naw, we've been married long enough, it's  all good."

There are a lot of details I can't share just yet but we knew we had a girl and a boy, 13 days old, some health issues that would keep them in the NICU for about a month. We knew that we would have to commit some time to get these babies through this, but,man, we were overwhelmed by how precious they were and we holed up in the NICU to get them through. We held them so tight that our arms ached  and I would sing and play James Taylor to get us through some rough times with our baby boy.

We have had the twins for 9 months now. There are days that I look in their room and see them and shake my head that there are two babies here.... two.... it amazes me that God answered Micah's prayer and gave us what we needed. When people know they are foster children, we are often told how lucky the twins are to have us and how great we are...... the thing is, we are lucky to have them and we aren't great, God is. We never wanted to do this until He changed our hearts.

We go to court this week. The permanacy plan is being changed to reflect adoption and to stop the plant to reunify with the parents. It is exciting for us but also bittersweet. We have been amazed at what we have seen God do during these 9 months.  He delivered our babies from something that adults struggle with, and He has given us the blessing of seeing these sweet ones as they reach milestones.

Please say a prayer. Court tears me up. I feel like crying just being in there. We want this over, to make them ours forever and get out of the system. Please say a prayer for us and the birth parents. They really need it.

The Gray's , all 6 of us.